A Good Old-fashioned Pep Talk

In my nearly twenty years of marriage I have learned that I don't want my husband to fix my problems. I am not totally helpless. Sometimes I just want to hear that everything will be okay. Sometimes I just need a little pep talk.

Sometimes life stinks. Or maybe it doesn't, and you just feel like you're lame. Sometimes life throws us a curve ball. We make mistakes, and things are just plain hard. 

Sometimes we just need a good old-fashioned pep talk to get us through. So, for you who might need it (or just want it), this is for you....

You are all right, and everything will be okay.

When we feel our trials are caving in on us, it is hard to feel in control. We try to make sense of everything. We question what is happening and maybe even why. We look at our situation, which is undesirable to say the least, and we wonder how to make it better or how it can be fixed. Will things ever be the same?

Trials hard enough all by themselves, but we can complicate matters when we begin to question ourselves. We question our ability to cope and survive or even if we will survive. We worry that we will fail--that we will fail not only ourselves but also those who need us. We believe we are the sole pillar of strength and that if we fall, everything around us will, too. Questioning and doubting ourselves steal our ability to manage ourselves. We are our own kryptonite.

The adversary would have you believe that you are weak. He is the thief of hope and strength. He knows that when you feel powerless, you will act powerless. He wants to blind you to the fact that even when you are hurting and struggling, you can get up again.

Know this: You are doing better than you think you are. You are stronger than you realize. You will make it through. 

During difficult times, it might be tempting, not only to question yourself but to question God. That is, perhaps, Satan's most favorite weapon. He would have you wonder, If God loves you, why would He let this happen? He would have you doubt that God can hear you. He would have you even doubt there is a God.

But God is real. He does love you. He hears you. He will support and guide you. He has faith in you. He is the One who is ultimately in control. And as you exercise faith in Him, everything will be okay.

I know that life can be challenging. Perhaps, as you read this, you are struggling. You might be doubting yourself or your decisions, You might be wondering if you have the strength to cope. Your faith might be wavering. Your heart might be breaking. You might be confused or tired. You might even be crying. But listen to me and believe what I say:

You are all right, and everything will be okay.

Because it's true. You can have confidence in that.

Make it Happen

I just got back from a Ladies Night Out at a local LDS church book store. It's an evening of food, music, and great vendors and discounts. I went to promote my upcoming book. You know. The one about insecurity.

So what did I do for the first forty minutes? I stood alone, in my corner, next to my little sign, while every single woman passed me by. 

After I while I decided to walk around for a bit, wondering if perhaps that would inspire someone to come up and exclaim, "Hey, you're that new up and coming author!" Nothing. Though, I did get an, "Excuse me, you're blocking the way," from one lovely soul. So, I returned to my corner of the store. Alone. 

Talk about a reason to feel insecure. Oh, the irony!

I looked at my little pile of promotional cards I had made, still untouched, next to my lovely little display, and tried to hide my bummness. I say bummness, because I wasn't sad. I was bummed. Really bummed. (Okay, maybe I was a little sad.) My first author event so wasn't going at all like I had envisioned. I felt like a total nerd.

Then I remembered a very simple principle. Successful people don't wait for things to happen. They make them happen. And I knew what I had to do. I took a deep breath, grabbed the stack of cards and introduced myself to the first woman in my path. "Hi. My name's Michelle. I am an author." And I am so glad I did! 

Speaking those words breathed life into me. The bummness left, and so did my alone time. From that time on I was walking and talking, laughing and sharing. It turned out to be a wonderful evening. I met funny women, strong women, quiet women, and so one. But, one thing they all had in common: as we chatted, they all confessed they had issues with insecurity. I wondered if there was every a woman that hadn't. I know I still struggle with some feelings of self-doubt--even after writing a book about it.

In fact, after I finished writing this book, I allowed a few seeds of doubt to grow too big, and I cried to my husband one day. "I feel so under-qualified to be an author--especially one that writes a book about confidence!" My good husband simply said, "It's your insecurity that qualifies you to write about it."

I had to laugh! There's a term in the writing world, "Write what you know."  Well, I have known all my life what it is like to feel insecure. Some days more than others. As I've grown in my testimony, those days of debilitating insecurity are gone, but there are some situations, like tonight, where I allowed a touch of insecurity to creep back in.

Self-doubt is a battle that most of us fight on a regular basis. The key word in that sentence is fight. Notice how it didn't say confident people don't wait for things to happen? I didn't wait for a burst of confidence to come before I gave out my first card. It was only after I made the move and said those words that the confidence settled in again. 

Confidence comes from many sources, one of them being the simple willingness to put yourself out there and try.

As you read this, there might be something you want to do, you hope to do, or are even in the middle of doing, but things are going like you planned. You might be doubting yourself, feel insecure. I wrote this post for you.

I not only hope you remember that phrase--Successful people don't wait for things to happen. They make them happen.-- but I hope it helps to do what you know you need to do. Get out of your corner. Make a move. Be bold. Own what you want and who you are. You'll find that when you do, a measure of confidence will follow. You will be glad you did.

Michelle

Oh- on a total awesome high-note, I was asked for my first autograph tonight. What?!?!  I know!